I had such a fortunate experience this week to be able to take care of my two nieces while my sister and her partner were away. It’s funny because we are very close but we don’t live close and so the older the kids get the harder it seems to be with all of life’s commitments to really get to spend big chunks of time with them. My kids are younger and when I told them we would be going for a sleep over and hanging out over the weekend they just beamed with excitement. So much so they woke early on Friday morning and first thing they asked was “are we going to see our cousins today?”.We drove down to Sydney in the pouring rain but not even that or the mad traffic we hit could dampen the spirits of these excited little munchkins. I picked up my nieces from school and we went home to begin our wild weekend of fun. Yep a movie night and homemade pizza’s were on the cards!
There is this sort magical thing that happens when the kids get together and I am not sure whether it’s a chemical or natural kinda magic but when the kids connect instantaneously they bond and pick up where they left off. There is no awkwardness and maybe it’s just a familiarity or security response but in a moment of them being together there is sheer joy and pure love. They all have really unique personalities but are also really accepting of each other just the way they are. As soon as we got home after being drenched in the rain the 3 youngest kids decided to get in the bath so they stripped off and just jumped in. Playing and singing, so uninhibited and so eager to share with me loads of trivial yet insightful knowledge. Each of them giggling and laughing, acting sillier than the next in order to capture and maintain my attention. The way the playfulness is amplified when there is more of them, when they feel safe and free is infectious, delightful and warming to the soul.
I have mentioned before that it is one of my strongest beliefs that we can dramatically change the future of the world by the way in which we choose to parent, connect, nurture and educate our children. The beautiful thing is as we invest in their best future, nurturing these little beings precious souls, we challenge our beliefs and patterns simulataniously. We too grow, evolve and shift. We question what we know and whether it best serves our children, our most valuable gifts as it is currently structured, we want to leave it better for them and we want to teach them how to best move through the world bettering themselves and all life. We give them the space to grow into their fullest expressions and as we connect with them from that place of pure love, they learn how to share from that space and pour that back into the world.
Watching the kids connect, naturally so open and loving reminded me how we are all born in this way. We are all born with our intrinsic being, a vehicle of love, compassion and truth. The human race is all the same at the core, we all want to feel loved and to give it out. Children just show this in the most extreme of ways, when they are in need of comfort and support they will surely hold you and hold you close as if surviving off your touch alone and they are so open to talking and engaging with you, giving you praise and cuddles without thought of whether you “deserve” it or not but because it is something deep within that compels them to show you love. They follow and connect with that place within, that drives them to be and live in truth. We were all like this once, for how long, I guess it varies on our experiences. We we’re all free in our love once and our ability to recieve it and to give it.
They went on to play with some toys and watch some telly and my eldest niece who is embarking on her teen years and I were preparing some snacks. We talked about what was relevant in her world today and what her and her friends were “in to”. We talked a fair bit about what is happening socially for her as she finishes her last year of primary school and how important her friendship groups were to her. It took me back to that time where navigating good friendship seemed to take up most of my time and how truly important that felt. It was beautiful to watch her tend to the younger ones, her touch gentle, a mothering instinct full and present. She had this beautiful way of flowing into childhood and connecting with the kids and then adeptly talking to me in adult like conversation. It seemed apparent though that her childhood is beginning to fall away, into a not too distant memory that she could easily tap into and her taking those first steps into her womanhood. It was a dance that happened throughout the weekend that I almost felt it was like a super power. One I thought I need to engage in more of, my playful inner child and my feminine goddess dancing through life and calling on whoever I may need to best serve me in any of life’s ever changing circumstances. A beautiful skill to work towards strengthening.
We made dinner, the kids making there own pizza’s and all huddled on the floor to eat as of course that seems the most obvious place to have dinner right? I asked if anyone would like to sit at the table but they all informed me the floor was fine and they were having a picnic. They all were skin to skin and huddle in tight, I thought this didn’t look that comfortable but I put my thoughts aside and joined them on the ground. It felt connected and intimate, a sharing of a meal that was bonding us. We then went on to watch a movie and we cuddled up close before bed.
The next day after the initial excitement had melted away and the late night to bed started to show it’s affects through the girls feeling a little emotional and them expressing missing their mum and dad. I remembered that feeling when you were away from your parents, worrying about them, missing them from that place in the pit of your stomach and hiding in a bathroom or secret hiding place to have a little cry. I walked into the youngest bedroom as she sat their sobbing into a letter her mum had left her. With her big blue eyes, all red around the brims, she looked up at me and said in a large sobbing cry ” I miss my mummy and daddy” and it all came streaming out. I sat next to her and I reassured her that I could completely understand why she was sad and that it was ok to cry. “Sometimes a good cry makes us feel so much better!” I told her, which hey I totally believe to be true. I sat with her and rubbed her back. Then my son came in and sat on the bed opposite as she continued to release her sadness, genuine tears falling from her face, all the while clutching the letter. My son looked at her jumped on her bed and sat behind her and said ” Yeh I miss my mum and dad too sometimes.’, Moving in closer to her to let her know he was there, supporting her. “it’s ok to cry cause sometimes we feel sad or angry or upset.’ the words I had told him not sure if he had taken them in had poured out of his mouth as he confided how he too recognised these feelings. My little Amika came in to see what she was missing out on. She came and looked at Daisy and then looked at me trying to make out what was going on. Intuitively she sat on my lap and started stroking Daisy’s back and telling her that “it’s ok”, she sat with her doing this for a few minutes. We all sat there, held that space compassionately for her all recognising on some level that we had felt like this too at some point. Her older sister standing in the doorway obviously feeling she needed to take responsibility of her younger sibling said ” I have made you something special to eat come lets all have a picnic.” I asked Daisy if she wanted to join us and she gently nodded. Her older sister told me she found these treats that she absolutely loves and knows they would definitely cheer her up.
I looked at these kids and thought WOW we can learn so much from them. They were supportive, compassionate and kind and in a moment when they saw someone really hurting, they were present and had pure love available and accessible to give out. Isn’t that what this whole experience is about, what we all are here to feel? Inside of all of us there is a seed of potential, a seed of pureness, a seed that is love. We can water it, letting light shine in on it but it really needs very little to grow, because it was born with the intention to grow into it’s full beauty. It doesn’t need forcing or protecting, when it is left and allowed to just be it will grow in perfection. Love needs very little to shine, hate takes far more energy to to access and spread. Be more like children, more present and connected to your seed of love and let it express itself fully outward into the world in which it was birthed into.
I feel so blessed to have spent some time with these guys and that the lessons they have taught me are etched into my heart. It’s these moments that are a blessing and I am utterly humbled to be connected to such beautiful crazy little souls.
Blessings A xx